Squirrels are just rats with fluffy tails

I have always envisioned a beautiful french country garden for all of the places that I have lived in and I thought this time I would really make it happen. My front garden has butterfly bushes and a small rose garden. I have beautiful bougainvilleas, gardenias and fresh herbs growing. I have a bird bath with a Celtic cross in the bowl of it and I have a 3 foot cedar wood bird feeder that would look heavenly for any bird.

Everything is wonderful…except for the unwanted visitors, the squirrels. I have always been an animal lover, but I will admit, I did shoot an armadillo once. However, while raising my boys, I have always taught them to love animals and not to hurt the lizards. This has not been easy and I have been successful, for all but maybe 5 lizards.

My 40th birthday came too soon like a credit card bill in the mailbox. I have to be honest and say that it was truly dreaded. My amazing husband Bret is a bit younger than I am, to my advantage since I act much younger than him most of the time. Let’s just say it’s good to have an adult around sometimes…if you know what I mean 😉

For my birthday my husband took me to brunch at the Ritz Carleton, which was amazing and fulfilled every food craving I have ever had in my life. He also allowed me to pick out things for my dream garden. I bought new flowers in all different colors, a bird bath and a bird feeder. I love birds, really!

I spent 4 long days ripping apart my front yard and reassembling it to resemble something like a garden. Most importantly I put the  bird feeder together by myself, that I am quite proud of 🙂 I placed everything in just the perfect place and I waited. I waited and I waited and I waited some more. After 10 minutes I was very disappointed…not one single bird.

I walked away from my garden, I went back inside, cleaned myself up and I heard movement in the garden. I could hear the birds outside, I ran to the window and what did I see…a big pair of squirrel balls faced right at me while he was tearing at my bird feeder! I grabbed for the hose…he came back and this time he brought friends. They dug holes in my gardens, knocked one of my newly planted flowers over to tower like the Pisa.

I searched the Internet for help and I decided on Moth balls. My eyes watered as I pulled them from the box, the children took 3 steps back and making a “yucky” face. I thought this to be a good sign. I placed the moth balls in the garden, not just anywhere, like a decorator, adding smelly accents to my garden. They looked like little decapitated snowmen all over my garden, but I didn’t care. When I was finished, I waited and I waited some more.

After a couple of hours I heard movement in the garden and I knew the savages were back. I waited patiently for them to keel over and die. I felt justified, I was doing it for the birds! What I saw was not death like dominoes, but laughing squirrels with big snowman shaped cheeks. The mothballs were now being carried off like prized nuts by the squirrels. I thought for sure they would die from them, but then the squirrels came back for more. They removed all 30 mothballs and I believe they have furnished their entire nest with mothball furniture, all thanks to the crazy bird lady with the hose.

After feeling defeated, I refused to refill the bird feeder only to nourish the demon squirrels for almost 2 weeks. They have since ripped chunks of the bird feeder off in rebellion and trampled every plant I have. So, today refusing to wallow in defeat, I refilled all the bird feeders I have, but I added cayenne pepper. This was another deterrent that I read about online we will have to see what happens.

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